Lets stop wasting so much money

Ok, time for some debate and controversy.

Marijuana was made illegal during the reaction to drug use decades ago. It was classified as a "Schedule 1 narcotic". In order to be classified as this, the substance must:

1) Have a high potential for abuse
2) Have no accepted medical use in treatment in the US
3) Have a lack of accepted safety for the use of the substance under medical supervision

Now, we could have a debate on number 1, but I'll concede there's a high potential for abuse. I'm not sure I see how that abuse has near the high level of consequence that a schedule 1 should have, but it really is easy to abuse. (So easy in fact that I think we can play hell ever STOPPING it from being abused)

Number 3? There are no safety issues with Marijuana at ALL, medically supervised or not. Unless you count people that are giving it to 8 year olds, or people that burned up their barcolounger because they fell asleep burning one, Marijuana is one of the innocuous drugs out there.

Now, lets move on to number 2.

I recently, due to my own medical issues, had reason to do some research. I found that there's growing scientific evidence that a chemical in Marijuana (Cannabidiol, or CBD) prevents tumor formation. It also for some types of cancer, seems to be able to attach to the receptors of the cancer cells, and tell them to "suicide". (this isn't far fetched, the body has methods of telling certain cells to kill themselves. It's almost the definition of cancer that thee orders stop working on them). CBD has NO narcotic affects. In fact, it seems to temper the affects of THC, which is the narcotic element of pot.

Of course, recreational users shoot for low CBD, and high THC, because that's the affect they're after. Increasingly however, the big push is for high CBD marijuana, which has a limited recreational appeal, and some very definite and VERY interesting medicinal qualities.

There is also excellent research showing it's very strong medicinal affects on Parkinsons, some types of epilepsy (Cannabis can easily cross the blood/brain barrier), and even weight management and/or diabetes.

For decades we've known the palliative affects Marijuana has on people undergoing Chemo, Radiation, or other harsh medical treatments. What we haven't known until recently is the curative aspects. In fact, there are very convincing annecdotal cases of people that were diagnosed as terminal, and after cannabis oil treatments were completely cured. The doctors found a completely dead tumor when they went in later.

Personally? Well, at the least we need to be researching this. At the least, we need to acknowledge that Marijuana never did fit the definitions for level 1 narcotic, and at this point it probably can only classify as something that might need to be age restricted.

We also need to admit that we are only preventing the people that need it most from using it the way things are. We will NEVER stop or even slow down recreational use. The only people that we're hurting the way it stands are the people that need it medically.

Bi-millenial updates

Wow.

Over 2 years since I posted.

That's gotta be a record level of neglect.

I doubt that anyone that might conceivably be interested in my life is still checking this blog, but just in case...

Just in case there's one die-hard fan that's been re-reading my scant few posts for two years, waiting for me to update them on my life...

Just in case someone has been worrying due to the dire circumstances I was in when last I posted...

Here goes.

I posted about my kidney last time. I did have cancer, they removed the mass and part of the kidney. I've been free of it for 2 years now.

My job was harsh, hard work, and low pay, but I gradually got better at it. I worked hard, and started noticing special attention being paid to me. Eventually I found out that I alone on my shift was accomplishing more than all the other people on my contract put together. That'll get you noticed.

So, they needed a guy to take tickets on the Web farm at Levi's. I sat with the current guy working that position (I was supposed to help him in a junior capacity), and he showed me a few things for about an hour... I went on vacation with my wife (yes I got married), and when I got back?

The guy that worked that contract had rage-quit.

I was stuck. Alone. On a completely new contract that I'd have less than an hour of an introduction to.

I did it though. There were a few hairy spots, but I saved that contract and things were running smooth. My bosses were working VERY hard to get me as large an increase in salary as they could, when I got a call on a job I'd been sneaking around going to interviews about for over six months.

I'd given up, but they hired me. I'm in the networking department of a state wide hospital organization now. For almost twice the salary I was making before.

This means I'm now earning more than I was PRE-recession.

My wife and I moved. We got rid of her old house. It was falling apart, had a creek running out from under it, and was going to fall apart. We got a nice new place with a moderate in-ground pool in the back yard, and are concentrating on enjoying it and keeping the kids from destroying it.

Partially successful on both fronts.

All in all, much better than 2 years ago, but still climbing out of the depths my professional and private life had fallen to.

I enjoy my wife's company. She gives my life purpose. She makes me laugh. I make her laugh. We take care of each other.

When we were all young, in our teens and 20's, we had SO many things we wanted from the person we were to marry...

As far as I can tell, the secret to a happy marriage is to just concentrate on that one sentence. I like her company. We take care of each other. She makes me laugh. I make her laugh.

What else is necessary? If you think more is necessary, you're probably young and you're full of shit.

Not your fault. It goes with your age.

As it is, my wife queries empty air "Who knew that the secret to a happy marriage was to marry the goofiest person I knew?".

Personally I think she's goofier than I am, but would never admit it to herself until she was spending her time with someone that refused to suppress his goofy side...

I'm in IT. IT people refuse to grow up in a lot of ways. We like silly, we like goofy, and we like smart-ass.

Everyone else can get used to it.

Well, lovely.

This has been a tough few weeks.

My aunt died. We were never close, most of the family found her to be a royal pain in the ass in fact. Still, she was family, and she showed up to every birthday, every graduation, every holiday, with her check book in hand. She deserves respect, if not affection.

My dog developed a tumor behind her right eye, along with an infection. After struggling with antibiotics for weeks, we had to have the eye removed so they could get at the tumor. The biopsy results aren't in yet, and my poor dog looks very very pathetic.

In the middle of my Aunt's visitation, my insurance company called to tell me that my landlord policy (I rented my old place when I moved in with my fiance) was in trouble because the underwriters did an inspection and found a broken window. I checked on it, it's only a crack in a basement window, and it's been there since I bought the place and they insured it about a decade ago.

A week or two later, I was going through the mail, and found two notices from them saying that my policy had been CANCELLED, they even sent me back a check. Several angry conversations later I was told if the windows were repaired in a week, it would be reinstated. I sent the photos of the repaired windows to them this morning.

Ah, and the final insult. I was having gallstone symptoms. This is odd, since I've had my gallbladder out, but apparently gallstones can still form. After about a week and a half of dealing with them and living on tuna and crackers, I went in for a CAT scan. After that they wanted an MRI. In the middle of this, whatever stone I had dissapeared, but they spotted a 4 cm mass on my right kidney.

I talked to an urologist, 85% of the time, this is cancer.

The good news is that in 90% of these cases, if they successfully remove the mass (NOT the kidney!), the cancer is never seen again.

So, I have surgery (laproscopic) on March 29th. They'll biopsy the mass after they remove it, and if it's cancerous I'll be having 10 years of follow up visits.

My family is full of rediculous optimists, so they aren't making a big deal out of it, but...

Well... 85% chance that I have cancer.

Not a pleasant thought. In fact, considering my life lately, it's hard not to be depressed. Laid off, two years of searching, working at 2/3rds of my previous salary, the only good thing that has happened to me in the last decade has been my fiance. It's hard to keep fighting sometimes.

But I will.

And so it goes.

Much has happened since my last post.

I'm still employed. It's been a year now. The pay is low, and they expect a LOT of knowledge, and they work your ass off.

Good people for the most part, but it's an outsourcing company. They don't pay well, half the idea behind their existence is that they can provide cheap expertise.

I'm engaged. I'm getting married on March 12th. We've sent the invitations, I'm popping $1k for a suit that I can't afford, and I just paid $160 for a white shirt. I'm no clothes horse, believe me... I'm just hard to fit, and even big and tall shops don't have anything that fails to look like shit. I'm thick chested, and anything I find that fits my chest, hangs off in a huge bag around my waist.

Custom made? Well, J doesn't want to walk down the aisle to marry someone that looks like crap.

The kids are a constant challenge. For someone who has spent his entire life in a warm, comfortable bachelorhood.... Well, lets just say that two teenagers are a bit of an ice bath.

The last six or seven years have been tumultuous for me. Now, coming out of the whole thing I know who my friends are, and even though I'm earning 2/3rds what I used to and am having to rebuild my career at age 51, it's better.

Microsoft suxxors

Lest I sound like I hate my new job, I don't.

I actually like my bosses so far, although I saw them fire someone in the first week. It's true he made a major error that cost a bunch of top level executives two days of e-mails at a large company... Still, it's a concern. Everyone makes mistakes, sometimes big ones. I don't know if this guy was on thin ice to begin with, or if this is the kind of place that kicks your ass out to save their own the second any mistake is made.

They don't seem like that type, but it's a consulting/outsourcing company. Given the choice between fair and keeping their contract, your ass is out.

If nothing else I can learn some new technology, get some practical experience... I'd rather be a network guy, but this place may force me to go back to being a Microsoft expert.

Microsoft sucks in SO many ways, and Microsoft guys don't get the respect because of that.

Yes sir, I'd love to eat your crap.

Just back in from a 30 minute walk. Shower done, lunch made, middle age aches stretched out, ready to go.

I got another job. Not a great job, but a job. You don't pass up on a job these days even if it's grunt work when you have 15 years in the industry, even if it pays 2/3rds of what you're used to making.

The weirdest part is the schedule. I work 12 hour days (11 if you count my hour off for lunch). It's 7:00 AM to 7:00 PM on Monday, Tuesday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, then the following week it's the same, but only on Wednesday and Thursday.

No holidays off. I get paid extra on holidays, but if I'm scheduled to work, I work.

It's amazing to me the kind of crap companies routinely expect their employees to accept these days.

Where's my four leaf clover?

Haven't posted in awhile.

Things have been bad. Employed, unemployed, employed, unemployed...

When I was in High School, I knew someone that had many auto accidents. Every time He'd had a car for awhile, someone would rear end him, or blow through a stop sign to sideswipe him... It was always classified as the other person's fault, and he'd always end up with a better car out of the deal.

I thought, "this can't be random chance, he's doing something, or NOT doing something". I figured there was something wrong with his driving habits to cause so many accidents. The man ended up in the hospital for several of these accidents, so I didn't believe it was deliberate.

I just thought that since I had almost NO accidents and he had so many, there must be some difference, some habit that caused him to be more vulnerable.

Now? I'm not so sure.

My brothers got a nice job right out of college. They work for a big company, they have training and health benefits, they keep earning more and more money, and they get more and more well-off.

Me? I do it all, and I do it well. I work hard, I accomplish everything put in front of me. I just always seem to be in position of losing out. I'm in a department that is closed down, I'm put in a bad political situation that ends up with me being let go for something completely out of my control.

Life isn't fair, I know... But some people seem to be in a continual situation of sacrificial lamb.

It's the worse possible situation. It's frustration, it's the feeling of being in a pit and continually clawing your way up without any purchase. It's being closed in, trapped, not able to get any purchase, and the sheer frustration of knowing how capable you are but not being able to show it.

Maybe... Maybe some people are just born to frustration. If some people are born to situations that allow them clear sailing their entire lives, might not some be born continual no-wins?

I've never known this kind of hell. How many of our most capable people have died in situations of quiet desperation?

Is success luck? It's definitely not simple capability. Maybe it's combination of the two, with luck being the most important.